second entry: headache

Hello again, just to give you some insight into how a cancer patient transforms minor bodily discomfort into a full-blown symptom of tumor recurrance: I have a hedache, And of course, as a consequence I am observing my left body half full of suspicion (my tumor was right, so the affected part of the body is left). And I feel dizzy. Is this it? Am I going to die? (well, some day certainly). Is there any twiching? am I loosing conciousness, do I have coordination difficulties? I wish there was a walk-in MRI to check on the status of my brain. Nonsense of course. I should work but this headache keeps me tied to the desk and I find myself writing this thing here. How ridiculous trying to be a scientist after a braintumor diagnosis. after having a golfball-size piece of tumor mass removed from my "most precious organ", or, as one could also say:MYSELF
As usual I am full of doubts.
But what can I do but to live/work on? stopping means let the tumor win. Unacceptable!!!
OK gotta do some work now.

CU

First entry of a potential/hopeful astrocytoma-survivor

Hi I am just starting my first blog, so apologies for poor style, unknowledgeable handling etc. And last but not least I am not writing in my native language. But what the hell!
Here we go:
Why write a blog about/connected to my brain tumor now, after such a long time? Shouldn't I be well-adapted to my state of eternal uncertainty? (will it eventually come back? will it not come back? Is the headache an early sign or was it just the beer/wine combination yesterday? Some of you may know what I am talking about.
I assume I am starting to write this to deal with my frustrations, fears, all the usual stuff....
Today at work (I work as a postdoc in a fairly famous Institute in Southern California, and I do (isn't it ironic?) CANCER RESEARCH. Not on brain tumors though, rather on leukemia. Anyway, from today on I plan to give a sporadic insight into my life/fears/ thoughts, not sure if anyone is interested....but again, what the heck, maybe someone is inspired by the sheer fact that I am still here more than 2 years after diagnosis, and still able to walk/talk/think/drive a car to go to work. Then this blog has its sense.
BTW, If you think you know me, please write me an email (if you know me you know my name and should easily figure out my email address, although I assume you can post a message here, as I mentioned I am new to this and haven't quite figured it out yet), and mention that you came across my blog entry here. (I am curious how exhibitinistic this really is.... and also if there is actually anybody resding this.
One reason to write this is also to see how many of "us" I can reach with something as a blog.
In case someone reads this looking for advice on tretatment, drop me a note and I'll be happy to tell you everything I know: (surgeon/treatment regimen/"alternative" supplements I am taking, the most important book on the topic, some promising publications in the recent scientific literature (on Kinase inhibitors in glioma treatment....)


OK TTYL! Hope I stick to my resolutions and keep on writing this....drop by once in a while and have a look, maybe there is something for you, and if its only to read about someone who is still alive and well (knock on wood)

CU next time

Thomass